I hate falling rain. Seriously. It’s so heavy and wet. There are so many times when it literally knocks me out of the sky. When that happens, my entire day is ruined. There are only a few things I hate more than falling rain: frogs, bats, fish, and repellant. I also hate those smelly yellow candles. Ugh! They’re awful! I can’t even come near them.

You may be wondering who I am because the Daniel you know is not this negative or hateful. Daniel is sweet, charming, and that is why I like sucking his blood!

  • [Break from story: Okay, before you freak out on this post. I’m not going to go all vampire on you. And this post is not as random/weird as you think. It’s a creative writing assignment about Malaria that I’m writing for Compassion International.]

Let me take a step back. Admitting to enjoying the taste of blood is a little freaky. Would it be better if I said I enjoy Daniel’s taste? Nope. Just as freaky. In fact, I don’t know how to make this sound okay so I will stop describing my eating habits. Instead, let me describe my disease carrying power.

You just need to know one thing: I have malaria and I will kill impoverished children this year.

  • [Break from story: This is a tricky assignment. I don’t want the mosquito to sound funny because Malaria carrying mosquitos are NOT FUNNY! They kill 655,000 children ages 5 and under every year. I don’t want this post to sound disgusting, because let’s face it – no one wants to read something disgusting. But how else can I describe a creature that sucks blood and kills people? I guess I could go the Stephenie Meyer route. “Let’s call mosquito #1 Edward. He’s over 100-years-old and enjoys dating young, high school mosquitos.” This story is not getting any better.  So let’s go for a slam-bang finish on this story and get off this topic before you and I both quit reading this blog indefinitely.]

SLAP! (Mosquito dies from traumatic injuries sustained from my left hand slapping that itchy mosquito-biting-feeling on my right arm.)

  • [Conclusion to this post: How’s that for a slam-bang finish? Our mosquito felt it, did you? Let’s squash malaria like I squashed the mosquito on my arm. Check out Compassion’s Malaria Intervention Page by clicking here. Or provide medical help for a young kid by clicking here to sponsor a child.]

On a scale from 1-10, how weird was this post? You can comment below…

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