No, the question and answer are not what you’re thinking!
Let me begin by asking you this: Do you like Valentines Day? Or do you hate it? I constantly meet people on both sides of the spectrum, and rarely meet people in the middle. People who love Valentines talk about the chocolate, colors, and how nice it is to get away for the night and spend time focused on their relationship. People who hate it, talk about how cheap the chocolate is, how pink and red don’t go together and how they don’t need a special night away because they do that regularly! Regardless of your personal feelings about this special or horrible holiday (depending on your perspective), I do have an idea for you.
What if instead of only going out to eat and buying gifts for each other, you used Valentines Night as both an opportunity to encourage one another spiritually and an opportunity to ask God what mission he has for your family to complete.
I’m reminded of one of my favorite marriage book featuring Francis and Lisa Chan titled, You and Me Forever. The focus of the book is to consider the question: why did God feel that it was more important for us to be together, than apart? Obviously, all of us that are married know the famous line often quoted at weddings: what God has brought together, let no man separate. (Mk. 10:9) God ordained that you and your spouse should be married, but not so that you could be happy (although God wants you to discover happiness in your marriage). Instead, the Lord has a plan for your marriage, and desires for some aspect of his mission in the world to be accomplished through your relationship as husband and wife. So what is that calling for your family? What is your mission? Have you and your husband or wife even discussed what God’s mission is for your family?
If your answer is, “NO”, don’t worry! Up until reading the Chan’s book, my wife and I had never considered what God may want to accomplish through us! But it’s an important question to ask. It’s important to consider: why did God bring us together? What mission is to be accomplished more effectively because we are married and not single?
That question—or two questions driving at the same answer—is the most important question you should ask your spouse on Valentines Day this year! And if you hate Valentines Day, that’s okay too, call it “the most important question that you should ask your spouse on a Sunday.”